Call it Crazy!

Earlier today, I overheard two gentlemen talking. One of them said: these are bad times to be courageous. They couldn’t be more right.

But that’s not what this entry is all about.

I can’t end (or begin) this day without summarizing how I feel about the past twenty-four (24) hours. The night shift is a crazy adventure but I seem not to regret being in one.

My peers and I were doing some training, the reason of which I’d rather keep to myself.

Tonight is perhaps the highlight of the week. I was in the company of great people. I laughed a lot. I can’t remember the last time that I enjoyed being awake in the wee hours of the morning but today is one of the best nights (or morning).

My friends (yes, I realized that they are no longer acquaintances or just workmates) and I talked about a lot of things. Some of those things were dreary – purely a vexation to the imagination, some utterly disgusting, some incontestably funny and some tested my tolerance for things, well let’s say unheard of.

I’ve always considered myself as an open-minded person. Tonight however, that thought of being open-minded was put to the test. I realized that there are a lot of things that can make me uncomfortable. I giggled like crazy but inside I felt embarrassed. My Lola’s conservative ideals rubbed off on me really bad.

But despite my being uncomfortable, I’d like to think of our conversation as educated. I learned a lot and my only regret is that to have the same group of people in one setting and to have such interesting talk will no longer be possible after May 3.

I hope I have painted a picture of a happy office environment. At least that aspect is happy.

Back at home, everything’s not as great. I’m beginning…

Honestly, I don’t know what I’m saying. I seem to be doing very good in making someone feel irresponsible and useless, as the person put it.

They said that there’s calm before the storm – and I’m not in the mood right now to be in a storm. But I think, the longer you are in a state of happiness, the greater the possibility of getting sad. I remember my mother back when I was young. Whenever my brother and I had too much fun, she would ask us -warn us to stop otherwise one of us will end up crying. She was right every time.

So this has been the lesson I’ve kept in my heart growing up: too much happiness is not good. The heavens only allow you to be very happy if it’s planning to take something away from you.

And I dread for that time to come but at this moment, I think it’s already at my very door and there’s no stopping it.

I know that the last five paragraphs prior to this are confusing. I think I will have clarity in the days to come and maybe by then I will be able to write with sense, too.